Friday, September 30, 2011
Page 15
AT THE SIDEBAR (Column)
Reality Show a Closet Addiction
By J’AMY PACHECO
I’ve made no secret of the fact that I have an addiction.
My friends and family know all about it, and I’m fairly certain I’ve confessed it in this space on more than one occasion.
The addiction is to a diet cola that doesn’t start with the letter “P.” I know I’m not the only one with this problem—which does start with a “P”—because a few days ago, my husband e-mailed an article to me about a person’s quest to stop sipping the very same bubbly brown substance.
You’ll never convince me there isn’t something addictive in the screw top bottles I buy. I crave the beverage when I wake up in the same way that other people crave coffee. And I don’t think it’s the caffeine, because I can get that in…well, coffee, which holds no appeal for me.
I actually managed to quit once, for just over a week. I was selected to be a cabin chaperone during a week-long elementary school field trip to science camp, and soda was on the list of prohibited items. In preparation, I cut way down on my morning libation, and almost made it through the entire week without even thinking about it.
The last day, one of the mothers who had been assigned to the adult cabin approached me with a bottle of liquid temptation. She was packing to go home, and had one left. Apparently, the grownups had smuggled in a cooler and enough soda to last for a week—plus one bottle. I couldn’t resist, and I was off the wagon. (I was also left wondering if the moms had been making margaritas all week while I was trying to get their daughters to stop talking and go to sleep. But that’s a different story.)
I suspect I may be addiction-prone. I’ve come to that conclusion because I’ve developed another addiction that I’m kind of embarrassed to admit here. But since that’s never stopped me before, here goes.
My name is J’Amy, and I’ve been watching, “Dance Moms.”
If you haven’t heard, “Dance Moms” is a reality show that airs after another show I rarely miss, “Project Runway.” I used to see the previews for the dance show while watching “Runway,” and thought it had all the class of “Jersey Shore.”
It never even occurred to me to check it out. But when some online friends started discussing it, my curiosity was piqued. I watched an episode, and was actually embarrassed for the people on the show.
That didn’t stop me from watching the next week, after an episode of “Runway” ended. By the end of the second episode of “Dance Moms,” I was so hooked that I set it up to record automatically. And then, I went to my computer and caught up on all the episodes I’d missed.
“Dance Moms” is like a cross between “Jerry Springer” and “Dancing With the Stars.” The stars are a group of dancers all around the age of 10; their mothers, who apparently have no responsibility other than hanging out at the dance studio, and the owner of the studio, a powerful woman who teaches the kids and yells at the moms. People storm out; people cry.
It’s so not the kind of show I would normally watch. I’m not even sure what sucked me in, other than the fact that the people are so weird that I keep wondering how much of the show is scripted. Oh, and the little girls really can dance.
Perhaps it’s the very weirdness of the show that makes me think it’s an addiction, as opposed to being just a show I like. There are other shows I like; for example, “Glee,” “The Big Bang Theory” and “Modern Family.” I think the new show, “Pan Am” will be another.
The difference is that my whole family watches those shows and laughs out loud together. We recommend them to friends and family, and aren’t embarrassed to talk about them the next day.
I feel like I need to watch “Dance Moms” hiding in the closet. While sipping a diet cola, in fact.
It blows my mind that the little girls never seem to go to school, and always wear full makeup. Despite the frowny-faces the moms make when the instructor surprises them with last-minute airplane trips, they always get on board.
Do I think people really live like that? Nah. Do I think I’m addicted to the show? Big time.
I just read that “Dance Moms” has been renewed for another season. I guess I’d better stock up on diet cola.
And maybe have a tv put in the closet.
Copyright 2011, Metropolitan News Company