Speed Dating Makes for Great Television

Friday, January 28, 2011

Page 15

AT THE SIDEBAR (Column)

Speed Dating Makes for Great Television

By J’AMY PACHECO

If there is one word I’d use to describe my television viewing habits, it would be “inconsistent.”

The first thing I remember seeing on television was a piece of a movie in which a group of people was in peril on a narrow, underground path. I think it was the 1959 version of “Journey to the Center of the Earth,” but I can’t be sure. I was very young, and was sneaking a peek while the babysitter watched television.

That wasn’t the only time I pulled a fast one and watched something I wasn’t supposed to. (Sorry, Mom.) My siblings and I spent a summer with an aunt, and while there, became addicted to the daytime gothic soap opera, “Dark Shadows.”

When we returned home, our stepfather forbade us to watch the show, insisting it was the reason a co-worker’s wife went crazy. The show usually ended seconds before our stepfather came home from work, so we watched it with somebody posted at a window to watch for his car, and often missed the end.

He may have had a point. It’s been decades since I watched “Dark Shadows” on television, but the memory of some dead pirates’ hands reaching through dirt as they rose from their graves still creeps me out. That’s good television—and it gives me a great excuse for any craziness I may have exhibited over the years.

My formative years were shared with “The Brady Bunch” and “The Partridge Family.” I had to catch my favorite series in re-runs, because in those days, most households had just one television. Ours was no exception, and the grown-ups were in charge of channel selection. Oddly enough, they never selected the shows I wanted to see.

Later, when I finally got my own place and television, I didn’t have time to watch. I was addicted to “MacGyver,” but other than that, the only thing I really remember going out of my way to view was a Friday night program that ran music videos.

As my daughter entered her pre-school years, we spent most of our television time tuned to The Disney Channel and what was then called PBS Kids. I was hooked on a few grown-up shows, and as soon as my daughter was old enough to understand the sometimes inappropriate language, I started watching them with the mute button clicked. I kept that up until she started to read, then quit watching prime time television almost completely.

When she was old enough for us to watch prime time again, we were driven away by the constant commercials. I realize advertising pays for television shows, but the amount of commercial programming got to the point where it felt more like the commercials were being interrupted with bits of television shows.

It took a program as wonderful as “Glee” to bring my family back to what my stepfather lovingly referred to as “The Idiot Box.” Then, a friend suggested we check out “Modern Family” and “The Big Bang Theory.” As funny as these shows are, I’m not sure we’d stick with them if we didn’t have the ability to record our favorite programs, then play them back at our leisure, fast-forwarding through the commercials.

So that’s what we do. It amazes me that we can get through an hour television show in something like 36 minutes by skipping the commercials. It’s like speed dating, only there’s no need to get dressed up and put on makeup.

Now that we can speed-date our television, we’re watching a lot more. We regularly record about a dozen shows, and actually look forward to sitting down as a family to laugh at the brainiacs on “Big Bang.” The show is the funniest thing I’ve seen in a long time.

We saw six or seven episodes before learning that the show has been on the air for several seasons. Now we’re ordering the early episodes through our movie rental service.

We did the same thing when a friend suggested we check out “Lost.” We were immediately hooked, and one recent weekend, watched nine episodes in two nights. We had to stop doing that, however, because I started having nightmares about zombies.

I haven’t actually seen any zombies in “Lost,” but I’m certain the show had something to do with the bad dreams. Now, we’re limiting ourselves to a single episode a night. I don’t want to go crazy or anything. I’ve heard it happens.

I’m not sure that spending more time on the couch watching television is necessarily a good thing, but it’s been a fun change of pace. Besides, with all the commercials we’re skipping, it feels like we’re actually saving time.

At least, that’s what I keep telling myself…