Electronic Pal Knows the Way Home

Friday, January 16, 2009

Page 11

AT THE SIDEBAR (Column)

Electronic Pal Knows the Way Home

By J’AMY PACHECO

I suppose it was inevitable that I’d end up with an electronic companion in my car at some point.

Toward the end of last year, I got lost not once, but twice, in the city of Riverside.

It’s not that I’m unfamiliar with the city – I’ve spent more hours there than I care to calculate, for one reason or another. But nearly every time I’ve been to Riverside, my activities have been contained within a relatively small area.

Both times I got lost it was for the same reason. In an apparent burst of civic pride, the city late last year ripped up seemingly every street in the area in which my activities usually take place, making it impossible for me to take familiar routes to the freeway. Both times, I ended up forced to drive north into an area of the city overflowing with three things: industrial buildings, railroad tracks and dead-end streets.

Both times, I ended up so hopelessly lost that I had to fight back tears. And both times, I was so lost that I had to call my husband at work, give him my location, and ask him find a map online and plot an escape route for me.

Because of this, I wasn’t too surprised when I found a GPS unit with my name on it under the Christmas tree.

We celebrated Christmas out of town, so I was able to try out the unit right away. We used it to find a particular restaurant off the freeway. The GPS unit performed beautifully – except for its insistence that the restaurant was on the right side of the street, when it was actually on the left.

We also used it to find an electronics store while we were out of town, because we forgot to bring the laptop charger. The GPS found three stores, which was great. I just wish it could have found one that carried the charger for less than $175.

The unit stores my home address. That means I can just press “home,” and it will figure out a route to get me home, no matter where I am.

Since I can also save favorites, it also means it will calculate a route to Disneyland from wherever I happen to be. I’m not sure that will be particularly helpful, since I can usually find my way there by following the scent of fresh popcorn and churros.

Once it’s calculated a route, it will tell me how far I have to drive, how long it should take me to get there, and what time I should expect to arrive. It also tells me how fast the car is going, which came in pretty handy when I was making friends with the unit while my husband was speeding toward that restaurant I mentioned. Oops.

It also talks me through the route. In a soothing female voice, it says things like, “In 350 feet, turn right.”

Although the voice seems unflappable, I quickly learned that it is possible – for me, anyway – to annoy the GPS unit. I sought out a particular restaurant, and got directions. When I was almost there, I decided to go to a different one. That threw my little e-pal for a loop.

“Turn left in 500 feet,” she ordered. “Turn left in 300 feet. Turn left.” When I continued going straight, I could have sworn I heard her sigh in exasperation.

“Make a U-turn as soon as possible,” she said sternly. She repeated the instruction until I turned the power off.

Once, I asked the unit to calculate a route to Honolulu, just to see if she would suggest a boat, plane, or a non-existent highway across the Pacific. Fortunately, she knew better, and suggested I choose a more realistic destination.

So I chose the furthest point of interest I could think of – Bar Harbor, Maine. Within about 30 seconds, she told me it would take about 51 hours, 31 minutes for me to make the 3,179-mile drive. I would, she speculated, arrive at 3:06 p.m. (She neglected to mention which day that would be.)

There’s no doubt about it – I adore my new car companion. Now I’m trying to come up with a name for her – something that takes into consideration not only her electronic insides, but her ability to point the way to just about anywhere I want to go – within the continental United States, anyway – in less than a minute.

I brought her to Riverside a few days ago, ready to put her knowledge to good use. Naturally, I encountered no road construction, so I didn’t even have to switch the unit on.

I’m hoping next Christmas I’ll get an upgrade – one that has arms and can actually do the driving while I nap.

Now, that’s my idea of the perfect car companion.