Good Behavior Is Not a Crime

Friday, August 4, 2006

Page 15

AT THE SIDEBAR (Column)

Good Behavior Is Not a Crime

By J’AMY PACHECO

Like most parents, I try to teach my daughter to be good.

Being good is, of course, a matter of perspective. For some, “good” might require perfection – a child who stays clean, does homework without prompting, takes on multiple household chores and goes to bed by 8 p.m.

For others, the definition of “good” might mean simply that the child hasn’t yet committed a felony.

Most of us, though, fall somewhere in the middle.

My daughter is a pretty good kid. She’s a little bit lazy, but she’s honest. Left unchecked, her television watching would stretch into the wee hours of the morning. She’d stay up all night and sleep all day, if she could. If allowed, she’d eat enough candy to put herself into a coma. But that will never happen, because she always asks for permission before eating junk. She tends to argue, but much of the time, she has a good point.

In short, she’s fairly normal. That makes it easier to raise my child, but harder to know when to draw the line.

Faced with a parenting dilemma, one thing I’ve never found myself wondering is, “What would Lindsay Lohan’s mom do?”

If you didn’t know of Lindsay Lohan from her movies, “Life Size,” “Freaky Friday” and “Herbie: Fully Loaded,” you’ve probably become aware of her in the past few days. The 19-year-old, currently shooting a movie with Jane Fonda and Felicity Huffman, has been making news because of a letter penned by her boss.

Morgan Creek Productions CEO James G. Robinson took the actress to task for missing work. While Lohan’s people have insisted her alleged missed work, late arrivals and ill health have been the result of hot weather and exhaustion, her boss said it was more likely caused by “all night heavy partying.”

A copy of Robinson’s letter was made public on The Smoking Gun and is now, naturally, a big news story. I suspect it would be even bigger if Mel Gibson hadn’t upstaged the starlet with his drunk driving arrest.

In his letter, Robinson urged the actress to conduct herself professionally, and warned that she would be held “personally accountable” for her actions.

But Lindsay’s mom fired back, describing the charges as “ridiculous” and Robinson as being “way out of line.”

“I don’t think it was a smart thing to do to a young girl,” Lindsay’s mom was quoted as saying.

Now, I’m not completely without sympathy for Lohan. Making a movie is probably hard work. Having fans and paparazzi who follow, document and report your every move – including your entrance to a nightclub shortly after you’ve received a reprimand for excessive partying – is probably exhausting.

But that’s why celebrities make the big bucks. For one of her recent movies, Lohan received a reported $7.5 million. I don’t know what she’s getting for “Georgia Rule,” but I suspect it’s enough that her colleagues expect her to show up for work on time – or at least show up.

Here’s where parenting gets hard. I’m sure Lohan’s mom/manager wants to defend her daughter. I know I would. But if faced with the same situation, I’d also expect my daughter to show respect for the bazillion people who are probably sitting around waiting for her to show up so they can make a good movie.

We’re going through a similar situation at home right now. My daughter’s teacher sent home a hefty homework packet for the summer, and expects it to be turned in when school resumes in September. My daughter is incensed that she has to take time away from television and Barbie-playing to do the work, which is mostly review.

I’ve explained the importance of keeping the brain active throughout summer vacation, but my daughter is still procrastinating on finishing the packet.

Attendance at her current school is a privilege – one she had to earn, and has to work to keep. That means giving up part of summer to solve some math problems and complete some writing assignments.

I’ll know I’ve succeeded when I see the finished packet. And if all goes well, maybe I can help with Lohan’s little problem.

The way I see it, all she has to do is stay clean, go to bed at 8 p.m., do her job — and avoid committing any felonies.

It doesn’t seem like too much to ask, especially in return for an enormous pile of cash. I think that’s what Robinson was trying to say.

As a mom, I have to say that seems like pretty good advice to give a young girl.