13th Year Not Exactly the Charm

Friday, April 28, 2006

Page 15

AT THE SIDEBAR (Column)

13th Year Not Exactly the Charm

By J’AMY PACHECO

Happy anniversary to me! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to Belgium.

It’s not like I’m in the mood for some really good chocolate. I believe I have to go, for my own safety and serenity.

You see, this month marks the 13-year anniversary of this column. I don’t know what is harder to believe — that I’ve somehow managed to fill this space approximately 676 times, or that people are still reading what I write after all these years. (I know I’m safe writing that, because if anybody sees it, it will prove my point.)

I suppose I’m exaggerating, because I haven’t had to come up with something to say every single week for the past 156 months. There was a bit of a lull between the time I wrote the column for a community newspaper and the time I moved to my current assignment with the Metropolitan News Company. During that time, I thought the days of spilling my guts in ink were over.

When my publisher casually mentioned at a legal dinner that I should start writing it again, I was pleased and grateful. I remain that way today.

It hasn’t been easy. Because I (sort of) vowed to stay away from politics, religion and just about anything else that might be considered offensive, more than once I struggled to come up with an appropriate topic.

That’s where the family comes in.

I married a guy who isn’t afraid of doing things that might end up helping me to fill this space. Just knowing he once set a toilet on fire to get to the bottom of a stubborn clog was enough to convince me he was worth keeping.

Our daughter has been an even richer source of material, almost since birth. I remember one day asking my then-toddler what I should say in my column. Her reply was, “Just tell them, ‘Lolly lolly loo.’” I managed to stretch that into an entire column.

While it’s been challenging, it’s also been fun and rewarding. Sometimes I can’t believe my good fortune, and I think about that old Steve Martin routine that highlighted the joys of being a comedian and ended with him marveling, “I—get paid—for doing—this.”

One of my favorite anniversary column things to do is review how much the world has changed since I started writing. For example, when I began, Bill Clinton was president.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg was appointed to the Supreme Court, and the World Trade Center was bombed, but didn’t fall down.

A first class postage stamp cost 29 cents. “Unforgiven” received the Best Picture Oscar, while “Picket Fences” was named outstanding drama series on television. On Broadway, “Kiss of the Spider Woman — the Musical” and “Angels in America — Millennium Approaches” received Tony Awards. “Jurassic Park” and “Groundhog Day” drew audiences to theaters.

When I wrote my first column, Richard Nixon, Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis, Princess Diana, John F. Kennedy, Jr. and his wife, Carolyn; Jerry Garcia, George Burns, Charles Schulz, Dale Earnhardt, Ann Landers, Bob Hope, Fred “Mister” Rogers, Ronald Reagan, Christopher Reeve and his wife, Dana, Richard Pryor, Rosa Parks, Chief Justice William H. Rehnquist, Anne Bancroft and Gene Kelly were alive.

A great deal has happened in 13 years; some good, and some bad. People have come and gone, wars have been fought, ended and started again; joy and horror have been experienced.

Which brings me to the reason for my sudden trip to Belgium. In America, the number 13 is considered unlucky. Nobody wants to stay on the 13th floor of a high-rise hotel. Nobody wants to have 13 guests for dinner. Nobody wants to do anything on Friday the 13th.

This makes me wonder if the 13th year will be a good one for me, or a bad one. Will my computer short out? Will my typing fingers freeze up? Will the letters wear off my keyboard keys? (Oh, wait that happened at least a year ago.)

I consulted a numerology Web site, which confirmed that the number 13 is bad news. I consulted a feng shui site that also said 13 is unlucky, but for more reasons than I have space to explain.

Anyway, I read that in Belgium, the number 13 is considered a lucky one. It’s considered especially lucky for women to wear the symbol “13.”

So, it’s been a great 13 years, but I have to go. If you need me, I’ll be in Belgium. And while I’m there, I suppose I may as well enjoy some chocolate…